Things You Need to Know First
A. When the following events took place, I was a Resident Assistant. An RA is basically a glorified babysitter of college students who has to talk to the cops surprisingly often.
B. I was living and working in a small all-male residence hall (it’s a long story), but the week before this happened, administration moved the top two floors of men out and moved a bunch of girls in. The remaining fellas lived on the basement level.
C. I’m not very good at anything when I first wake up, besides being mean. People fear me in the mornings.