What he said: “The dentist said he couldn’t believe I was still single with teeth like this.”
What I said: “Now you just need to find a lady friend with equally excellent teeth and have babies with teeth that make orthodontists weep.”
What he did: Ran away.
What I should have said:
5. Well, you know what they say about men with good teeth. Good… chewing.
4. You should make plaster casts now so you can have perfect dentures in case you ever lose your teeth in a terrible accident.
3. Did you know that herbivorous dinosaurs had peg-like teeth, the better to strip leaves off plants?
2. Did you see last night’s game?
1. Literally anything else.